For a long time, I assumed that the “A” in “LGBTQA” alphabet stood for ally.

I was not alone in thinking this, but now it seems like I am alone in knowing that the A stands for Asexual. Just yesterday I mentioned the notion of asexuality to an acquaintance, and they were genuinely surprised that asexuality even exists.

It’s no surprise that they wouldn’t have known, since everyone else seems content to say “ally.” I’m not about to say it’s wrong to call yourself a straight ally, but there’s no reason for you to be included in the acronym.

When you get down to it, being a straight ally is really just being a decent person. Good, you recognize that it’s normal to not be heterosexual and that those who are otherwise should be treated as human beings. Does this really deserve a pat on the back?

Meanwhile, there are asexuals: individuals who do not experience sexual attraction at all. Awareness of this as a valid sexuality is growing, however slowly, but it doesn’t seem to have reached the Emporia State campus. The homepage of the recognized student organization People Respecting Differences in Education’s site includes allies—with that capital A—but doesn’t say anything about asexuals.

I am so grateful that P.R.I.D.E. exists here, I am so glad they’re doing what they do, but they can do much more by taking the necessity of “allies” out of their mission statement and instead giving it to the group that needs that recognition. Ignoring asexuality is erasure, even if done by accident.

The reason communities like P.R.I.D.E. exist is to provide an accepting place for people to go. Allies do not have the same need of this safe space. In fact, a real ally should know that they don’t need to have any kind of focus placed on them. Help and acceptance: these things can and should be provided without the big letter A.

I do not personally know any asexuals. Or at least, I don’t know if I do. I couldn’t blame them if they remained quiet about it. ESU may be an accepting campus for all, but without us recognizing that they exist, can they really feel safe?

Don’t stop being a straight ally, if that’s what you want to be, but at the same time, don’t take the spotlight away from a group that is actually oppressed and in need of that recognition.